When it comes to films, every movie out there isn't striving to be an Oscar worthy film. Some films are nothing more than popcorn fun filled with explosions and elaborate stunts. Some films know they're of B-movie quality, but revel in the cheap fun and gross outs. Much like the film industry, so too goes the videogame industry, and Onechanbara: Bikini Zombie Slayers is one such game, as it's not high quality or deserving of a game of the year status, but there is fun to be had for gamers.

Slice and Dice

Onechanbara tells the story – of which there is very little – of two sisters named Aya and Saki, who were cursed with the legacy of the Baneful Blood. In essence, the blood of the sisters compels them to fight the undead, as they get off on the rush of power and thrill the spilling of undead blood brings them. Lucky for them a new zombie plague has hit the world, and so Aya sets off to eliminate the threat so as to protect her younger sister.

The story is mainly told through pre-level scrolling text, but there are a few in-game cutscenes, most notably before boss fights. The premise of the game is great, because really, who doesn't like the idea of hot Asian girls killing zombies and getting off on the bloodlust and buckets of blood and gore. Mmmmm…excuse me. As for the story itself, however, it's very loose and not that coherent. It becomes a bit more interesting and rounded if the player branches out to play the story mode of all the characters, but if they were to just play one girl's story there wouldn't be much to take away. Each girl's portion of the game seems to take around two hours to complete, so about eight hours total to experience the entire story mode.

Gameplay is pure hack-and-slash, which reminds me of Soul Calibur Legends in terms of style, but with a much better control scheme. The player uses both the remote and nunchuk to control their character, as they'll use the thumbstick to walk around, the Z-button locks on to a character, the C-button is used to switch styles, the A-button jumps, and swings of the remote and nunchuk issues main attacks and kicks. Players also have different attack abilities depending on the character, as Aya can throw knives, Saki can do throws, and Reiko can shoot shotguns and automatics to name a few examples.

It's not that easy to just run in an enemy's direction and hack, as you'll miss more often than not, so it's much easier to lock-on to an enemy and attack till they're dead, getting any secondary enemies that might get in your sword's range. The lock-on works relatively well, though it will get wonky sometimes when it auto locks on a next target after the current one is dead, and sometimes it seems to break without you letting go of the button. The lock-on problem will also cause some problems during evade rolls and flips, but it's not so much a problem as it will cause you to die.

Aya

Almost all of the enemies can be killed by wildly slashing with the remote, especially during the early levels. The game has more complex attacks that reward you for proper chaining, but they aren't needed to complete the game. The only extra move beyond a remote waggle you'll need is one combo where you waggle three times, pause a second, and then thrust forward. The Ecstasy Gauge move works well as a close quarters clearing special whenever you chain enough attacks, but the special moves that require the loss of your health are a waste.

Out of all the moves and attacks at your disposal, however, it's the Splatter Gauge and Berserk mode that are the strangest. You'd think spilling so much blood on yourself would be a good thing since it makes you more powerful, but it's actually a negative in this game since the Baneful Blood seems to be technically a thing of evil, and thus the girls are somewhat scared of the power. The Splatter Gauge keeps track of how much blood is being absorbed by your skin, which comes from regular killing and collecting red orbs. Once you've absorbed enough blood you go into Berserk mode, which changes your appearance and makes your attacks much stronger, including being able to kill some enemies with normal attacks that usually require special moves instead. The drawback to going into Berserk mode is that it's constantly diminishing your health, so you actually want to try and keep as dry as you can. The only real way to get the blood off you from level to level is finding one of the deity statues, which warp you to a special room that will cleanse you. I actually found Berserk mode actually to be the toughest enemy as…no joke…I've died three times because of it, but never because of the enemies.

The game also features a RPG like leveling system, which lets you place points into various attributes like Skill, Vitality, Power, and Reach to help you during the game. A player could theoretically spend quite a bit of time leveling each character if they wanted until they were maxed, but I didn't notice much difference between one level upgrade to the next.

My biggest gripe about the gameplay is that there just isn't enough depth for long sessions of play or for the long run either. It's fun to jump in and slash away for a level or two, but anymore than that and fatigue starts setting in, as there definitely isn't that "one more level" mentality that some games do so well, forcing players to play into the wee hours of the morning. It helps if you increase the difficulty, but for the most part it's just too repetitive and with little else the player needs to do than point towards an enemy and flick that remote like a madman.

Outside of the story driven mode, players can also play the Free Play mode, which lets up to two players on one screen compete together to complete quests that unlocks new costumes mostly. Besides tackling zombies with a friend to do quests, you can also both compete in a Survival mode, which has you going up against wave after wave of zombies for as long as you can muster. The only other mode the game has is a Practice mode, which you can use to help practice some of the harder to master moves.

Graphically the game is very weak, only excelling when it comes to unleashing a ton of blood and splattering it onto the television screen. The characters you control look decent, but the rest of the enemies are pretty uninspired, as the crows are hard to see against the sky, blocky creatures skitter about the ground, mud monsters look like globs, and zombies don't really standout unless they're wearing blue (the cops are harder than regular zombies) or if they're holding a chainsaw (though it's more for show as I don't think I was ever attacked by one). The worst offender in the graphics department is the environments, which are recycled and reused for every character's story, which boil down to places like a subway, cemetery, city streets, mountains and caves, and underground facility. The levels are devoid of any character and are really nothing more than arenas for fighting, which is a highlighted idea when so many moments happen because stakes rise up and box you into a controlled fight environment. The walls are also pretty straight and without any real depth, and collision can be a problem, as you have very predetermined paths you must walk. For example, though it looks like you should be able to jump off a train platform, instead you have to walk down the stairs and around.

Lots of Blood

The sound effects are pretty good when it comes to the grunts of zombies and the sounds of swords slicing through meat or bullets filling up a corpse, but they're not revolutionary by any means. The music is "so-so" and the voice work is okay, but you better like hearing Japanese, as there aren't any options for American voices.

So the game has some glaring problems, but some of them can be tolerated pretty well, and part of that is thanks to the mentality the player has approaching the game. If you're expecting a game with the quality of a Zelda, Mario, God of War, or Halo then you'll think the game is a pile of trash. Why anyone would think a game with the subtitle of Bikini Zombie Slayers would be on their caliber, well, who knows? Instead you have to go into the game knowing what you're going to get: girls killing zombies…and lots of them! It's not pretty and it's not complicated, but why should everything be? I wish it was a little more polished, but for what it is it's still a good time for certain individuals.

Score