The idea of a cooking game never really appealed to me, as I'd actually like to be rewarded for my actions. I want to eat! I was willing to give the genre a shot, however, after Food Network: Cook or Be Cooked ended up on my doorstep just waiting to be reviewed. I have a Wii and enjoy the Food Network, so it should be a win-win situation…right? Well, not so much. Playing the game is like getting part of the way through a sandwich only to find the bread is moldy in the middle – it was good to start, but once the mold is discovered the whole thing becomes tainted.

Perfect Score

Two executives/on-air personalities from the Food Network magically get up and walk through your television and into your kitchen to see if you have what it takes to be a great cook. You're tasked with completing 30+ recipes and trying to get the best score possible. Do you have the cooking chops to impress the two impish people?

The first problem up is that the 30+ recipes is a bit misleading, as it makes you think there's going to be 30+ levels to the game or different meals to make, but the truth is there's only 12 meals to make and the recipes part corresponds to every thing in those recipes. Cooking breakfast should be one recipe itself, but instead it counts as two since you're making breakfast and eggs. It's misleading and overall poorly explained; almost feels like someone trying to rip the unaware gamer off. Another problem I have with the recipes is there wasn't anything that really stood out to me and made me want to go and make it for myself (the actual measurements and instructions for the recipes are in the manual). The game teaches making pancakes, bacon, and things like cheeseburgers, but I was looking for something a bit more daring and complex. I wanted to be shown something new I haven't tried…not something I can eat any day of the week by going through a drive-thru window or shoving it in the microwave.

Another problem (see a trend) is that once you've played two meals you've basically experienced everything the game is going to throw at you. You'll swirl oil around a pan, sprinkle seasonings, pour items, watch timers, stir bowls, and chop ingredients. The game uses the Wii remote and nunchuk, though the nunchuk is largely wasted; you'll flick it to perform simple actions like moving pans or taking food off and on…nothing more. Meanwhile, you'll mimic with the Wii remote to perform chopping movements, pouring motions, swirling motions, and shaking motions. The game handles the movements somewhat well, but other times its register is completely off. Pouring, for instance, often didn't read the down pour, but rather the flick up, which means it often put very little oil in and screwed up my perfect score.

Another annoyance is with the scoring system itself and how it's nearly impossible to know how to get a perfect on some steps. Pouring into a marked area or stirring to stay in a moving designated area is easy to understand, but why is it impossible to get a perfect chopping celery? I'm either going too fast or too slow. The funny thing is that when I did manage to accidentally get a perfect while chopping, the game animated the ingredient flying all across the board and then magically flying to the bowl. I would've thought ingredients flying everywhere when cut would've been a bad thing. It's also not easy cracking eggs perfectly or knowing that when you're flipping something in the air, the game's actually registering if you're flipping it too hard (thanks for not informing me game).

The only thing somewhat challenging is actually utilizing proper time management; the game did help me become a better cook in that respect. Each recipe of the meal has its own time commitment, so you need to plan things properly so all the food is plated at the same time and remains hot (less points the colder it is). Guacamole could be made whenever in order to eliminate a potential time waster when something else is going, but yet you get more points for multi-tasking and doing one thing while another is happening. So do you play safe or go for extra points? You don't want to lose points, but yet you want to get the gold medal if possible. With that said, it's almost impossible to perform poorly and fail, unless you just go out of your way to purposely suck and see what happens; even hard meals aren't that challenging.

Multi-tasking

The game features three modes: single-player, hot potato, and multiplayer. Single-player is self-explanatory while hot potato is a round robin type of mode where you and other people take turns doing different steps in the meals. Multiplayer, meanwhile, is split-screen and has you and another person going against each other to see who can make the meal the best.

Graphically the game is sub-par, as nothing stands out as truly awe-inspiring. The graphics are simple and somewhat clunky, though it is mildly nice to see food actual brown and change as it cooks. The character models of the hosts have a somewhat Pixar type styling to them, which aren't bad, but I hate that their animations are canned; whenever you serve a meal they always eat it the same way and their mouths move for comments in the same manner despite something new being said (it's like watching a badly dubbed Godzilla film at times). The sound and vocal work is surprisingly good, however, as the game does indeed sound like you're cooking in a kitchen, and the hosts are likeable enough and throw in some interesting facts about the food you're fixing or the process you're doing. The comments from the hosts are sometimes annoying, but for the most part they're well done.

If you've got a little child who likes to play with an Easy-Bake Oven or likes to pretend they're playing chef, Food Network: Cook or Be Cooked might not be a bad game for them; they'll like the feeling of doing cooking and won't pay attention to the faults of the game. For older and more seasoned players, however, the game is almost a complete waste of time and money. Don't bother pretend cooking – go learn to do the real thing. Save the money you'd spend on this game to buy a nice cookbook instead and maybe some utensils or a bowl or mixer.

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